Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Week 37 - Final milestone (Stretchmarks!)

About 90% done with preparation I think. heh.

-Button sleeping attire bought (4piece almost 200. -.-) -> for me.

-Milk bottles, bottles steriliser, brush for bottles, nappy cream, nipple cream, breast pumps, sterilized cotton balls, Pacifier, nail clippers, water thermometer, nappies, leftover diapers, wet wipes, ru yi oil (both winnie's grannies bought 1 bottle each. lol), jin feng san, covers for mattress,  pillow, bolster, herbs, many many longans and red dates..

-Mike couldn't resist getting a cute toy to hang at the cot for Winnie's entertainment hahas.

I'm really very nervous about the operation and seeing Winnie for the first time. It's barely a week left!!

New issues every other week.. This week's issue is stretchmarks!
The look is bad, the itch is worse!!
So I asked my mum about it and apparently she doesn't have any!! 4 kids and she doesn't have any? Why life so unfair ah? Then Mike says it's because all 4 of us are premature babies, so she never carried us till full term plus the 4 of us are all so tiny! eh.. yah. that kinda explains it.. The four of us are born like a month early, the youngest one I think almost 2 months early? We missed the "put on weight" period. hahas.

Apparently the little ones grow most of their fats in the last bit.. so most of the time stretchmarks appears closer to the date of birth cause of the sudden increase in bulk inside... something like that. hahas. or if you're having twins.... :)

Monday, November 19, 2012

Week 36 - Feeling Low

Feeling kinda negative the past week, tearing at the slightest issue and had a full meltdown on Sunday. I've experienced this before and I know what is happening.

Was aware of postnatal depression but never thought it's possible to have depression during pregnancy. Did a search and found this article on babycenter.com.sg quite helpful.

About 10% of pregnant women suffers from a period of depression during pregnancy.
As the symptoms varies from person to person, there's no fixed symptoms for depression. The article listed some of the more common symptoms that one may have if he/she is suffering from depression.

A. Inability to concentrate
B. Anxiety
C. Extreme irritability
D. Sleep problems
E. Extreme or unending fatigue
F. A desire to eat all the time or not wanting to eat at all
G. A sense that nothing feels enjoyable or fun any more
H. A persistent sadness
Symptoms D and E seems like a normal part of pregnancy.
I had all the above symptoms and I didn't know it. Well,  not until the meltdown on Sunday anyway.

This is what I felt in the past week.
Feels as if my husband doesn't care or understands me, and felt like he's always telling me off for something or another. Everything he says feels like he's using an angry and irritated tone on me, and all the things he does, it feels like he's not willing to do it but he's doing it just because I'm pregnant.

Feels like he's finding me very irritating and trying to get away from me. It really makes me feel very useless and angry at the same time. I teared almost every other day and couldn't find anyone to complain to. It's like who will believe me when I complain about a attentive husband being not attentive? It doesn't help when he's out all the time for his work, his friends, even when he's home he's always on the comp and phone, playing games or chatting with his friends. It just makes me feel so left out.

It's something that many people experienced without knowing they are experiencing it and it's even more difficult for people around them to understand what they are going through. Sometimes people used really negative terms or words, thinking that it will help them, like asking them to "snap out of it", "stop dwelling", "stop self-pitying" and stuffs like that.

Depression is not something you can just suddenly and immediately snap out of. It takes time for the person to try to get out of it. It's not a small paper cut that you can stop the blood from flowing with just a plaster. It's more like a bigger wound that needs care and concern to heal over a period of time, for some, it just takes a longer period.. The most important thing is for the person to accept that he/she is going through this phrase and opens to getting well. Well, at least it works for me. When I know I am going through it, I try to find ways to let out all the "bad thoughts".

I'm writing this entry because I want it to be a reminder to myself.
For my daughter, I will get myself out of this!

In other news..
Winnie's cot is here!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Week 35 - Shopping / Final preparations for the day

Finally packed the hospital bag though there's really nothing much inside. :( I believe I still need like 2 sets of comfy button sleepwear or something. Bah.. Need to ask my mother. She's more experienced in this. :P

Last weekend we finally bought the baby cot, will be delivered this coming weekend and once it's done up, our room will finally look a bit more "baby ready"!

We've also bought the baby bath tub, baby wash and the powder lotion.
Still have some items yet to purchase and I'm starting to feel a little stress out. :(
- Bath water thermometer.
- Wash cloth and towel for baby
- Cloth Diapers (Mummy says she will get it)

Bah. I don't know if we've missed out any essentials. There's just so many things to prepare and I'm such a scatterbrain. :(

We've folded Winnie's clothes and put them in a compartment in our wardrobe. Yet to clear out one of my plastic cupboards to put Winnie's stuffs inside. Got to clear it next week before Winnie's here. :D

Monday, November 5, 2012

Week 33/34 - Responds to sounds

This is the period where we get more responds from Winnie and her every action makes me feel like hugging her right away. :)

She's like a baby, waking up many times a day just to disturb me.
When I'm eating
When there's music
When her dad just come home from work and she hears his voice
When I'm bathing
When I'm going to sleep
When I'm waking up
When I'm seating on the low chair
When I'm in the toilet
Particularly when I'm conversing with other people (eg. my mum, my brothers, my friends)
or when I feel her kneecap or elbow sticking out and I touch it. She'll squirm a little.

There are times when she stretches out her legs or something and I feel discomfort and pain.. I'll tell her it's painful, she should not do that and she will slowly move her leg back. :) Of cause I know she doesn't really understand what I'm saying but it does makes me feel like she's responding to my voice. :)

This week, we got the used baby clothes from my MIL, these clothes are given by Mike's Aunt. Put everything into the washing machine to wash and they are all so adorable. I mean they are all so tiny!

Honestly I think we don't seem very excited or prepared. I've know friends who've already started to prepare so many baby stuffs and we barely have any baby stuffs at our house. :P No pram yet cause still can't make up our mind which one to get. No baby cot yet cause we're expecting the cot to come in when I'm at the hospital, but we've yet to order it till today. Oh. the only stuffs we got are detergent to wash baby clothes and baby body wash. :P

I did get some stuffs for confinement though. 7 weeks worth of disposable underwear, a few nursing clothes and some nursing bras. :)

Mike's going to be very busy at work and I'll need to find time to go shopping with my mum for other stuffs. She's leaving her job in about 2-3weeks to prepare for my confinement. Her first grandchild and even though she doesn't show it she's actually quite excited. :P Afterall she have had 4 kids so she have enough experience to stay so calm. :P

Packing the hospital bag tomorrow when the mummy bag comes in. Not sure what to bring exactly also. bah..